The Ashley Madison Hack Aftermath; The Cheaters Named!

**KARMA** is a resting bitch face best served up COLD, my friendsicles! 

Beyond people who hurt children and animals, I would say CHEATERS place 3rd on my ultimate s**t list. If you are going to throw your kibbles and bits around where they don’t belong, then you deserve to be CAUGHT in such a magnified, monumental way! Yes, my Schadenfreude is merciless.


…And so without further ado, here’s a short run down of the Ashley Madison hack aftermath—post the data dump release of 32 million names.

Kicking Asses & Taking Names

A photo illustration shows the Ashley Madison website displayed on a smartphone in Toronto, August 20, 2015. Love lives and reputations may be at risk after the release of customer data from infidelity website Ashley Madison, an unprecedented breach of privacy likely to rattle users' attitudes towards the Internet. Hackers dumped a big cache of data containing millions of email addresses for U.S. government officials, UK civil servants and high-level executives at European and North America corporations late on Tuesday, the latest cyber attack to raise concerns about Internet security and data protection. REUTERS/Mark Blinch - RTX1OZ5D

REUTERS/Mark Blinch

The more notable cheeeetah‘s on the list have been Josh Dugger who sang like a canary, admitting his ‘hypocritical’ misgivings as soon as his name became public. Good thing he didn’t play the DENY card, as just yesterday news surfaced that Dugger recently hired a porn star he did not meet on Ashley Madison. Even more worrisome, said porn star claims that she was manhandled in a ‘terrifying‘ way by Dugger who paid her $1500.00 for the deed. Dugger has now checked into a “faith-based” addiction rehab?!?! and this entire story (including the former sexual abuse of his sisters) makes me want to boil my brain with bleach.

Dad Surprise Preg Video Guy

Speaking of religious zealots, Christian vlogger Sam Radar is also hiding behind Jesus & JC’s Daddy after being named, but claims he was merely a Looky-loo troll (ya, right?!) who never went beyond curiosity…

The account was open out of pure, fleshly desires and sinful curiosity. I’ve sought forgiveness to God and he has forgiven me. I never met with a single person face-to-face from that website and that I never had an affair with anybody, ever.” —Liar Liar Pants on FIYAH

realityshow z listers emphasis on zzzz

…The husbands of Z-list reality stars with an emphasis on the Zzzzz’s have also been CAUGHT in the Ashley Madison crosshairs. Jionni Lavalle and his wife the Pokémon guidette of Jersey Shore fame—Snooki (on Left) are denying the allegations with a united front. Real Housewives *star* Kristen Taekman’s millionaire husband Josh Taekman (on Right) first tried to deny the allegations, but after it surfaced that he accessed ie; paid the site 62 times—he reissued a lie statement that he signed up as a ‘joke’ with friends.

Jokes on you buddy as you try to super glue your marriage together! I hope she takes you to the cleaners!!!

While other names have floated through this scandal, a former prosecutor, a Texan police chief, so far its all very Maury Povich quality wouldn’t you agree? I’m looking for A-list names! Where are all the cheating A-Listers?!

Christmas in July

While divorce lawyers are claiming a huge spike in business hence the moniker ‘Christmas in July’ reputation PR firms are also seeing a boon in biz.

According to the CEO of Reputation Management Consultants Eric Schiffer, the firm has received dozens of “desperate calls” from “some very famous and wealthy people“.

We’ve received unbelievably desperate calls from famous politicians, top celebrities and extremely wealthy executives freaking out!”

Is Schiffers online PR prowess and those like him the reason we haven’t been privy to these more powerful figures? Can money protect these titans from eventually being named? According to Schiffer it depends on what email address was used and if it can be traced back to the rogue scallywag hubbies→my words not his. He did say “Eventually though, they perhaps will [be found out]” denoting that he’s more of a picking up the pieces service, as opposed to a firm that can make the pieces disappear altogether.

Several spinoff crimes are popping up, whereby sites that promise to remove alleged names from the database list for a fee, are simply scams and only exposing people to viruses and malware.

Time will tell as this is a list that is ripening in real-time, with every day bringing forth a new hall of shame. Stay Tuned!

A couple of updates on the case at large:

Last week 2 Canadian law firms filed a $578 million anonymous class action suit against Ashley Madison’s parent company Avid Life Dating, and a litany of others have followed. Read about the suits that totals to a half a billion dollars here from NBC news. Many of the plaintiffs believe the company had ample time to warn its users to remove themselves from the site as well as protect their privacy better with available encoding technology.

On their end of this fracas, Ashley Madison is offering a $500,000 reward for information on the hackers. Considering the Canadian dollar is at an all time low, it’s truly chump change for anyone in the US.

Personally, I think they should save their Nancy Drew money—they’re going to need it!


Faithfully Yours,

New Crop



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s