March 2017 Where to Go + What to See/Hear Pop Culture Consumables Guide

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Who among us isn’t a quasi shut-in during the bleakest month of February—spooning ones cat as if she/he/non-identifying/were your emotional LIFE RAFT + the only reason to get out of bed in the morning to face the overwhelming dark sludge of ones existence?

Ohhh, just me? *clears throat nervously

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**MARCH** is the most opportune month to reinvigorate your POP CULTURE diet and get up to speed on all of the latest need-to-know releases & cool hunter happenings!

It’s time to STOKE that inner fire leave the darkest recesses of my duvet & pillow fort as the world around me you begins to thaw for the coming spring!

GET OUT!

The Montreal en Lumiere festival is continuing on until March 11th and **TONIGHT** is Nuit Blanche—a culturally edifying array of guided tours, workshops, installations, parties, performance art, gastronomy and films just to name a few! Open until 3am, there is a king’s ransom of stimulating and inspiring offerings (over 200 FREE activities!) adroitly sprinkled across Montreal in an easy-to-navigate landscape. This year Nuit Blanche has joined forces with Montreal’s 375th Anniversary for an “Expo 67” themed evening of programming that is sure to add a memorable dimension to the annual indoor/outdoor event.

Dress warm kittens, ’cause baby it’s cold outside!

MUSIC

The Chainsmokers

Grammy award-winning artist/producer duo The Chainsmokers (how cu-uuute is Drew Taggart?!) have been dropping Hansel + Gretyl-esque musical bread crumbs over the past year like “Closer” and most recently “Paris.” Finally, their debut album Memories Do Not Open [Columbia] is set to release April 7th, and will feature “Paris” as well as 10 additional never-before-heard tracks from the hit making duo. 

Jamiroquai

I feel like I may have willed this next one as I have been dreaming of a NEW Jamiroquai album forevs?! Ok fyyne, I don’t have that much power but Jay Kay is BACK after a 7 year absence and according to the response on my Instagram, the world is COLLECTIVELY thrilled by this! Ok, FYYYNE, just 65 of mainly my friends but whose counting? Be sure to download the e-n-t-i-r-e Automation [Virgin/EMI] album when it drops on March 31st, like any good 90’s kid would do.

…I can’t for the life of me control the rest of you impatient millennial maniacs!

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PODCAST

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On February 15, 2014, fitness guru Richard Simmons disappeared. He stopped teaching his regular exercise class at Simmons, cut off his closest friends, and removed himself from the public eye. Nobody has heard from him, save for a recorded telephone interview he had with TODAY’s show Savannah Guthrie about a year ago. Missing Richard Simmons follows documentarian (and former Daily Show producer) Dan Taberski as he tries to piece together CSI-style what happened to the famed fitness guru. The six-episode (so far) podcast which has reached #1 on the charts has gripped listeners but I think it’s all “a bunch of horse pucky”—something Simmons would totally say, at least in public. Apparently behind the scenes he has quite the potty-mouth.

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The man gave us his glorious lubed up legs and 24-7 glittery gay-enthusiasm for decades—all-the-while concealing his own lifetime battle with depression. Can’t we let him have some WELL DESERVED alone time without making him into an absolute mockery?

For SHAME people, For SHHHHHAME!

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*But listen to the podcast anyway, cause its ‘hella entertaining.

BOOKS

Sleeping Reading is truly one of my life’s greatest joys. Here are 2 spanking new reads to stimulate ‘yo synapses for the month of March.  

One Day None We’ll All Be Dead and None of this Will Matter [Doubleday Canada] is a collection of brilliant essays by Canadian Buzz Feed editor Scaachi Koul. And just because that holier-than-thou “real journalist” smarty-pants would never deign to follow me back on Twitter, I can still take the high road and give praise where it’s due. *Curtsey.

Whispers… “what. a. thunder. c**t.

South and West [Penguin Random House] is penned by none other than THE Joan Didion and details her account of a visit to New Orleans back in the 1970’s. Both non fiction titles are available on March 7th at my favourite place in the world besides my own bed, Chapters Indigo.

POP UP

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Toronto friendsicles: (I’m bi-provincial if you didn’t know), you must attend this ONE DAY ONLY cereal pop-up café—CEREAL BOX CAFÉ on March 10th, at 867 Dundas, St W Toronto, ON

Between the hours of 5-10pm you can choose from some of your favourite childhood or adulting cereals, some unknown international flavours “Chocella from France anyone?,” toppings akin to the ones found at your favorite frogurt spot, and AND your choice of 8 different types of milk including STRAWBERRY!?!?

Don’t dare miss it!

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Comedian Dave Chapelle flexed his comedic A-game on his debut SNL appearance back in November 2016—raking in the seasons highest ratings (6.2 million viewers).  A day later I tweeted that Chapelle should “get his own show back” and that this time he would definitely take the $50 million that he famously gave up in 2005 before fleeing to Africa.

Even better than I predicted, Chapelle was offered $60 million for three separate hour-long Netflix specials. The first two of said specials—Deep in the Heart of Texas and The Age of Spin were already pre-taped shows done in 2015 and 2016. They both premiere on Netflix on March 21st and here’s a video preview.

No word on the yet-to-be-taped all new 3rd special, but you will hear about it here first, so stay tuned!

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So there you have it, some of the latest cool-quotient consumables for the month of March.

Now thread that pop culture needle lover heads!

XOXO,

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The Ashley Madison Hack Aftermath; The Cheaters Named!

**KARMA** is a resting bitch face best served up COLD, my friendsicles! 

Beyond people who hurt children and animals, I would say CHEATERS place 3rd on my ultimate s**t list. If you are going to throw your kibbles and bits around where they don’t belong, then you deserve to be CAUGHT in such a magnified, monumental way! Yes, my Schadenfreude is merciless.

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…And so without further ado, here’s a short run down of the Ashley Madison hack aftermath—post the data dump release of 32 million names.

Kicking Asses & Taking Names

A photo illustration shows the Ashley Madison website displayed on a smartphone in Toronto, August 20, 2015. Love lives and reputations may be at risk after the release of customer data from infidelity website Ashley Madison, an unprecedented breach of privacy likely to rattle users' attitudes towards the Internet. Hackers dumped a big cache of data containing millions of email addresses for U.S. government officials, UK civil servants and high-level executives at European and North America corporations late on Tuesday, the latest cyber attack to raise concerns about Internet security and data protection. REUTERS/Mark Blinch - RTX1OZ5D

REUTERS/Mark Blinch

The more notable cheeeetah‘s on the list have been Josh Dugger who sang like a canary, admitting his ‘hypocritical’ misgivings as soon as his name became public. Good thing he didn’t play the DENY card, as just yesterday news surfaced that Dugger recently hired a porn star he did not meet on Ashley Madison. Even more worrisome, said porn star claims that she was manhandled in a ‘terrifying‘ way by Dugger who paid her $1500.00 for the deed. Dugger has now checked into a “faith-based” addiction rehab?!?! and this entire story (including the former sexual abuse of his sisters) makes me want to boil my brain with bleach.

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Speaking of religious zealots, Christian vlogger Sam Radar is also hiding behind Jesus & JC’s Daddy after being named, but claims he was merely a Looky-loo troll (ya, right?!) who never went beyond curiosity…

The account was open out of pure, fleshly desires and sinful curiosity. I’ve sought forgiveness to God and he has forgiven me. I never met with a single person face-to-face from that website and that I never had an affair with anybody, ever.” —Liar Liar Pants on FIYAH

realityshow z listers emphasis on zzzz

…The husbands of Z-list reality stars with an emphasis on the Zzzzz’s have also been CAUGHT in the Ashley Madison crosshairs. Jionni Lavalle and his wife the Pokémon guidette of Jersey Shore fame—Snooki (on Left) are denying the allegations with a united front. Real Housewives *star* Kristen Taekman’s millionaire husband Josh Taekman (on Right) first tried to deny the allegations, but after it surfaced that he accessed ie; paid the site 62 times—he reissued a lie statement that he signed up as a ‘joke’ with friends.

Jokes on you buddy as you try to super glue your marriage together! I hope she takes you to the cleaners!!!

While other names have floated through this scandal, a former prosecutor, a Texan police chief, so far its all very Maury Povich quality wouldn’t you agree? I’m looking for A-list names! Where are all the cheating A-Listers?!

Christmas in July

While divorce lawyers are claiming a huge spike in business hence the moniker ‘Christmas in July’ reputation PR firms are also seeing a boon in biz.

According to the CEO of Reputation Management Consultants Eric Schiffer, the firm has received dozens of “desperate calls” from “some very famous and wealthy people“.

We’ve received unbelievably desperate calls from famous politicians, top celebrities and extremely wealthy executives freaking out!”

Is Schiffers online PR prowess and those like him the reason we haven’t been privy to these more powerful figures? Can money protect these titans from eventually being named? According to Schiffer it depends on what email address was used and if it can be traced back to the rogue scallywag hubbies→my words not his. He did say “Eventually though, they perhaps will [be found out]” denoting that he’s more of a picking up the pieces service, as opposed to a firm that can make the pieces disappear altogether.

Several spinoff crimes are popping up, whereby sites that promise to remove alleged names from the database list for a fee, are simply scams and only exposing people to viruses and malware.

Time will tell as this is a list that is ripening in real-time, with every day bringing forth a new hall of shame. Stay Tuned!

A couple of updates on the case at large:

Last week 2 Canadian law firms filed a $578 million anonymous class action suit against Ashley Madison’s parent company Avid Life Dating, and a litany of others have followed. Read about the suits that totals to a half a billion dollars here from NBC news. Many of the plaintiffs believe the company had ample time to warn its users to remove themselves from the site as well as protect their privacy better with available encoding technology.

On their end of this fracas, Ashley Madison is offering a $500,000 reward for information on the hackers. Considering the Canadian dollar is at an all time low, it’s truly chump change for anyone in the US.

Personally, I think they should save their Nancy Drew money—they’re going to need it!

XOXO

Faithfully Yours,

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New Pop Culture Infusions Coming Soon!

Hey Pop Culture Lover Heads!

August has been a bit of a slow month I will concede, but I will be back next week with a brand new post on the Ashley Madison hack.

…And remember The Pop Culture Rainman™ is ALWAYS 100% original brand spanking new content. I don’t regurgitate others people’s hard work + stories and simply repost them here on the daily like ‘some bloggers’ do—isn’t that what Twitter is for?

Also, I like to s-t-re-t-c-h out my thoughts in what millennials like to call Long Reads? I just look at my work as THOROUGH and well rounded—I’m not a sound byte type of scribe. I may not post every day, but it’s always cutting edge, 24-carat legit AWESOMENESS!

To sum up…The Pop Culture Rainman is like a fine vintage Merlot you slip SLOWLY out of a Riedel Sommeliers wine glass on a veranda in Paris, as opposed to the kind that comes out of a BOX, that you drink out of a plastic cup…in the back of a pick up.

**Spot the Difference**

It’s your ball Internet …

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XOXO

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Buh Bye Hipsters, Say Hello to the Yuccie!

Image: Bob Al-Greene, Mashable

Mashable’s David Infante coined a new social trope today; The Yuccie-The Young Urban Creative. It’s a brand new moniker befitting of millennial intelligentsia—specifically, a trickled down metabolite of Yuppies + Hipsters.

You pronounce it like ‘Yucky’ and it has an extensive back-story worthy of an award winning screenplay.

But because I am not the author of this barely 24-hour old pop culture paradigm, I will throw it over to the original article highlighted below.

 Will the Yuccie Become Sticky? 

Let me know your thoughts?

XOXO

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