- Fall greetings my kittens!
Sincere mea culpage for having taken a longer-than-norms blogger sabbatical this summer.
What was I up to you ask?
Travelling the far corners of the globe taking up feline-inspired needle point and making sweet, sweet love with my boyfriend actor Charlie Hunnam, crouching in the corner of my shower with a sponge in my mouth to muffle the sobbing.
Also, I feel it super necessary to mention that it was indeed another braless summer…
Fall Fashion is upon us! That vainglorious time of year when I wade through the seasonal trends and curate a unique FOXIFICATION guide so that you are fashionably on point this fall, or as the kids like to say “so lit.“
Ready, set…get F-O-X-I-F-I-E-D!
While this title sounds like a low-budge slasher film starring Caitlyn Jenner, it really is the conundrum that has confounded fashionistas for millennia:
How does one transition into fall?
I say it all starts with your feet—specifically the coverage of them.
No longer are airy-fairy flip-flops acceptable post labour day and/or your Burning Man comedown.
Substantial footwear is how you take that first step into fall.
I listen to everything Iris Apnel says. Girlfriend just turned 95, has her own set of Emoji’s and is a total ledge.
Heels and booties aren’t exactly groundbreaking fashion intel, but a trend that unites them both this season are stiletto-high heels with string details in exquisite oxblood/burgundies & royal blues.
*Click on photos for product info
Honorable mentions go out to these g-g-gorgeous boot offerings…
From L to R: Brian Atwood, Isabel Marant & Francesco Russo
Think grandma’s couch circa 79’ (that was covered in plastic!) and you will get a pretty good idea of what brocade looks like. It’s an opulent fabric worthy of a royal clarion call upon entering any room (that light blue Miu Miu ‘tho!)
If its all a little too head-to-toe ornate for your tastes, the St. Laurent booties or the Self-Portrait Bomber jacket—another huge trend this fall, can be seamlessly worked separately into any outfit.
For this 80’s section, lets 1st set the table properly shall we? …Aaaand cue music!
This classic music video is brimming with sexual tension in every frame. The porny Cleopatra/Mark Antony scenes, the gushing background fountain, an astronaut writhing on a mattress, those pounding keyboard fingers—the whole spectacle is a work of artistic genius!
Back to fashion! First up I must give ample credit to where its due.
Holy Alexis Carrington-Colby **Feels**…
YSL came out swinging with its fall 80’s game—replete with sexier than thou nymphs slithering down a gilded staircase that could easily double as part of the Dynasty set. It’s all so James Bond’s Octopussy meets the Addicted to Love Girls with pink-neon-sex-lasers shooting out of their eyeballs—n’est-ce pas?
No, you cant see the pink neon lasers, but if you say Octopussy 5 x’s fast they will magically appear.
Ok fyyyne, I’m uncertain as to how I would incorporate these first two outfits into an evening out—and by evening out I mean Netflix, a bag of Fig Newtons & my Slanket—but I fully appreciate the dedication and continuity of it all. Kenzo’s hot pink zebra-striped dazzler might fair better off the runway in a separated scenario, and to Moschino’s biker zipper leather skirt vixen I say…er…Yayyyyy Taffeta!? I was wondering how and when they would bring that elusive fabric back, and look at that…look, eh…, sorry, yea.. I can’t do this.
But wait, I would so wear that Isabel Marant red satin sizzler (…or is it silk? Who could really tell?) but only with a pair of full body Spanx and if there was roller skating. There must be roller skating.
The best bet for you to incorporate some 80’s fall fashion into your ‘drobe is to cherry pick some key accessories, instead of going full-on ZZ-Top video parody.
From L to R: Christian Dior Earrings, Dsqaured2 Sequined Bag & Fogel of Switzerland White Lace Tights
I normally avoid the colour red like a Kardashian All-Weekend E! Marathon, but in a crushed velvet version in that Haider Ackerman Russet Red…I want to BATHE IN IT! Below are some runway examples of this highly wearable and versatile fall trend. Special shout out to that **swoony** Elie Saab Hollywood siren gown!
It’s oh-so SWOONY.
*Click on the photo for product info
Also if you haven’t noticed, fur is an absolute no-no for me, and just look at the things you can do with velvet these days?
I mean hello, Fendi bag!?!?
*No foxes were hurt in the making of this bag.
Two great trends happening in the sweater dept. for fall 2016.
First off, the oversized sweater in a host of varieties by Miu Miu, Gucci & the artfully frayed Simone Rocha in black.
…and Joseph really broke the mold on bringing this trend to the forefront. I adore them all, especially the last one which reminds me of the 80’s NAF NAF sweaters.
Secondly, the sweater dress has made a comeback with a mix of classic and utterly modern interpretations. If I had the choice I would wear these solely & exclusively all fall/winter long on the yearly, until infinity.
*Click on photos for product info
I came up with this title, as to me it exemplifies the flouncy & lacey detailed dresses (and Rodarte pants!) that were front and center for fall 2016. Standouts were the Roberto Cavalli mustard dress worn by Beyoncé in her “Lemonade” video, the ‘Chinoiserie’ inspired dresses from Alexander McQueen and this billowy violet stunner at Giambattista Valli.
In fact the entire Giambattista Valli (try saying THAT 5x’s fast?!) fall couture show was such-a-tour de force that it is best exemplified by Celine Dion’s vigorous brand of French-Canadian **feels** from when the chanteuse was front row back in early July.
But the true stars of the catwalk were those fierce Rodarte femme fatales in black lace and leather. WERK it ladies!
In fact their entire look (jet black hair & bangs, dark stained lips, is my fall beauty foxification inspo—coming to this blog in 1 week!
Fall 2016 was awash with inventive accessory options, but two bold trends stood out for me.
This trend is for the kind of women loves to make demonstrative entrances that changes all of the molecules in the room. A style arbiter and conversational polymath that everyone wants face time with! No other accessories need apply.
Top left to right: I spotted these Gucci works of art on Instagram super-fluencer Aureta + the stately lion gems are also by Gucci. The micro orchids at Rodarte were real and sadly didn’t last more than a day, but I appreciated the artistry!
Bottom left to right: It was love at first sight when I clocked in on those Simone Rocha precious jeweled flowers, they also come in black (hard to choose!) And mirror mirror on the wall…Lanvin’s show stopping metal duster earrings for fall 2016 and their resort 2017 tassel earrings for the win!
Pearls. Sounds about as basic as beige paint and a bowl of tofu. But these aren’t your garden-variety stepford wives pearls. Oh no. Pearls have gotten a sexy modern upgrade for fall 2016. Stand outs are the Dries Van Noten pearl pin choker (I love both colours!) and those pearl Louboutins are so much fun!
…And that’s all she wrote for the Pop Culture Rainman’s Get Fall Foxification Ready Guide~Fashion & Accessories Edition!
I know this barely pierces the fall fashion membrane, but be sure to follow my Pinterest for the entire breadth of the 2016 season.
Be sure to check out my Get Fall Foxification Ready Guide~Beauty Edition October 5th!
Stay Tuned & Stay Foxy,